Friday, August 16, 2013


I confess that although I have written and published many books, I am not really computer savvy. Technology and new generations of software are difficult to keep up with in one's latter season of life. Unfortunately, I never had any instruction in computer basics. I write by the seat of my pants and rely mainly on my grandchildren to "come show grandma how to do this." But occasionally I have got myself in over my head.

Rather than falling deeper into the mess that I have somehow caused, I have to go to the top and call on my son Rick who is my webmaster, creator, installer, and maintainer of all my hardware and software systems, with the plea “Please come rescue me! I'm in a muddle big time!” In my impatience, I want Rick to come immediately to deliver me from my dilemma.

He assures me he will come “in the fullness of his time.” But sometimes he doesn't even have to come to my writing studio in person. He is able to help me from wherever he is, at work or elsewhere. 

First, he lovingly chastises me for being careless in managing my documents and failing to follow his instructions, or God forbid, have done something that made me think I “lost” some documents or folders. I dutifully confess and acknowledge my ignorance and probable wrongdoing. Then he tells me to sit back in my computer chair, keep my hands off the keyboard, and trust him to handle the problem. Gladly I comply. 

I gaze in awe and wonder at the monitor display while watching the curse move here and there as if by magic searching for the solution without my touching it. Often it probes deep into the invisible-to-me squiggly brain and heart of my computer where the “language” is not even intelligible to me. All without my interference. All from a distance controlled by someone unseen, someone wiser and more capable than I, someone whom I trust with my welfare who is working for my good. Always, “in the fullness of time,” the mission is accomplished! Sigh of relief, gratitude expressed, and a second chance (or third or fourth or tenth chance) for a new beginning.

Mistakes, errors, faults, wrong decisions, unwise judgments, foolish actions, foul-ups, and sins are not confined to any one season of life. I am as prone in my advanced years when I am supposed to have accumulated some wisdom, as I was in my youth when such blunders might be more excusable. 

I am still learning that if I try to fix or solve some of my self-caused dilemmas, I dig myself in still deeper and create a worse mess. I end up in despair. At times I have been afraid that my circumstances were unfixable.

David the king and Psalmist was always getting into major muddles. I echo his distress. I also have to “call unto the Lord in my distress” (Psalm 18:6) with the result that “and He rescues me.” “God is our refuge and strength, a very present help in trouble” (Psalm 46:1). I admit my need and inability. I confess my impatience to be rescued. “But I am afflicted and needy; hasten to me, O God! Thou art my help and deliverer; O Lord, do not delay” (Psalm 70:5). 

I finally come to the point of trust. “In God I have put my trust; I shall not be afraid” (Psalm 56:4). The Lord who is all-wise, whom I can't see, bids me relax and trust Him and let Him work on my behalf. I lean back and gratefully watch Him take over for me.

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